Adding header to all pages, removing TOC and double entries in header and costum pagenumbering

Question

I'm setting up my thesis in memoir class.

Questions [Those that have been answer are marked with (!) and the code has been amended to reflect the answers]:

1. How do I make my headers and footers show up on the first page of the chapters? (!)
2. How do I avoid the TOC title in my header? (!)
3. How do I avoid double title in the header on the reference page?
4. How do I add the abstract as a 'section' or 'chapter' in my header? (!)
5. How do I remove total number of pages in frontmatter material (TOC and abstract) only?

I have been reading in the memoir manual a good while, but I can't really get my head around it and it doesn't seem to contain the explanation as far as I can see.

I'm trying to avoid any usage of fancyhdr, because of incompatibility issues.

This is the simplest version I could make, considering what might be pertinent and to give a picture of what I'm trying to do:

\documentclass[12pt,a4paper,onecolumn,twoside,final]{memoir}
\usepackage[english]{babel}
\usepackage{lmodern}
\usepackage[T1]{fontenc}
\usepackage{newcent}
\usepackage[utf8x]{inputenc}
\usepackage[textwidth=14cm,textheight=22cm]{geometry}
\usepackage{apacite}

% Header & footer content

\makepagestyle{HDR} % Create a new pagestyle
\aliaspagestyle{chapter}{HDR}

\makepsmarks{HDR}{\nouppercaseheads % Following code to edit the pagestyle

\createmark{chapter}{left}{shownumber}{}{\space}
\createmark{section}{right}{nonumber}{}{\space}

\clearplainmark{toc}
\createplainmark{lof}{both}{\listfigurename}
\createplainmark{lot}{both}{\listtablename}
\createplainmark{bib}{both}{\bibname}
\createplainmark{index}{both}{\indexname}
\createplainmark{glossary}{both}{\glossaryname}
} 
\makeevenhead{HDR}{}{}{\normalfont\bfseries\rightmark\hskip.5cm\vrule\hskip.5cm\leftmark}
\makeoddhead{HDR}{\normalfont\bfseries\leftmark\hskip.5cm\vrule\hskip.5cm\rightmark}{}{}
\makeevenfoot{HDR}{\small \thepage\ / \thelastpage}{}{\miniscule Thesis, ID, Institute, Universit}
\makeoddfoot{HDR}{\miniscule Thesis, ID, Institute, University}{}{\small \thepage\ / \thelastpage}

% Title and Subtitle
\newcommand{\TIT}{A thesis}
\makeatletter
\addtodef\put@bsintoc{}{\markboth{\abstractname}{}}
\makeatother

%Frontpage Design
\newcommand{\FTP}{\begingroup
\vspace*{1cm}
\begin{center}
\Large \textsc{Jane Smith} \\
\huge\bfseries \TIT \\
\end{center}
\newpage

% Information Page

\noindent\today \\
Student ID: 00000000 \\
Supervisor: John Smith \\
Number of Characters: 000000 \\
\endgroup}

% Chapters & sections titles
\chapterstyle{hangnum}

\begin{document}
\frontmatter
\begin{titlingpage}
\FTP
\end{titlingpage}
\pagestyle{HDR}
\tableofcontents*
\begin{abstract}

\end{abstract}
\mainmatter
\chapter{One}
\section{OneOne}
\chapter{Two}
\section{TwoTwo}
\chapter{Three}
\chapter{Four}

\backmatter
\appendix
\bibliographystyle{apacite}
\bibliography{Test.bib}

\end{document}

Answer 1

Question one:

\aliaspagestyle{chapter}{HDR}

Question two: You add it your self, see the \createplainmark{toc}{both}{\contentsname}, however it needs to be cleared out completely, add the following to you HDR definiton instead of the {toc} line

\clearplainmark{toc}

Question three: Hard to say as you do not show how you make your abstract. Always post minimal examples, not just sniplets.

---

As already mentioned \clearplainmark works jsut fine, but you have never activated the HDR style, i.e., you are missing a

\pagestyle{HDR}

As for the abstract, I probably would not use the abstract env as I do not feel it fits the design of the document. But if you want to use it then add this to the preamble to add header for the abstract

\makeatletter
\addtodef\put@bsintoc{}{\markboth{\abstractname}{}}
\makeatother