A quick look at the file pgflibrarypatterns.code.tex
reveals that the predefined patterns do not accept modifications through keys. You will have to create your own pattern, or modify the existing ones to make them key-aware.
The following code shows the definition of a my grid
(more dense grid) pattern, side by side with the predefined grid
:
\documentclass{article}
\usepackage{tikz}
\usetikzlibrary{patterns}
\pgfdeclarepatternformonly{my grid}{\pgfqpoint{-2pt}{-2pt}}{\pgfqpoint{4pt}{4pt}}{\pgfqpoint{2pt}{2pt}}%
{
\pgfsetlinewidth{0.4pt}
\pgfpathmoveto{\pgfqpoint{0pt}{0pt}}
\pgfpathlineto{\pgfqpoint{0pt}{3.1pt}}
\pgfpathmoveto{\pgfqpoint{0pt}{0pt}}
\pgfpathlineto{\pgfqpoint{3.1pt}{0pt}}
\pgfusepath{stroke}
}
\begin{document}
\begin{tikzpicture}
\draw [step=0.5cm, pattern=my grid] (0,0) rectangle (1.4,1.4);
\draw [step=0.5cm, pattern=grid] (2,0) rectangle (3.4,1.4);
\end{tikzpicture}
\end{document}

Here's the oritional definition of the grid
pattern:
\pgfdeclarepatternformonly{grid}{\pgfqpoint{-1pt}{-1pt}}{\pgfqpoint{4pt}{4pt}}{\pgfqpoint{3pt}{3pt}}%
{
\pgfsetlinewidth{0.4pt}
\pgfpathmoveto{\pgfqpoint{0pt}{0pt}}
\pgfpathlineto{\pgfqpoint{0pt}{3.1pt}}
\pgfpathmoveto{\pgfqpoint{0pt}{0pt}}
\pgfpathlineto{\pgfqpoint{3.1pt}{0pt}}
\pgfusepath{stroke}
}